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Saturday, August 13, 2011

Freestyle Funky French Fail-F*ck!

I am almost too embarrassed to even show you the horrendous nail art fail I produced all by my little self.  I said almost! I figure the only way to learn is to show you guys what I am doing wrong so you can help me with your Obi Wan Kenobi wisdom.  The force is NOT with me at this time.  I feel like nail art is something I will never be able to do.  I'm not even trying to do elaborate things. Just dots and stripes. How sad is it that dots and stripes are kicking my ass?

I started with one of the new fall Essies called Power Clutch.  When I ordered this, I thought it was a distressed khaki green. I even said in a past post that it may be a dupe for Chanel Khaki Vert.  Well boy was I wrong.  This is a straight dark gray creme. If you had seen my post "Trying the 'it' color" seen here, you would know I am not really a huge fan of gray on my nails.  This color is darker than RBL Stormy but along the same color family. Here it is before I screwed it all up.

It is pretty all by itself though isn't it? Onto the next phase of the royal awfulness, I got out my new nail art brushes.  I put some polish on a paper plate and tried to do stripes as practice on the plate.  All I got was smudges, never a line or a dot.  I tried the dotting tool, that just put a dent on my nail, not a nice dot of polish.  So I said the hell with it, and free formed stripes with the brush the polish came with.  I used RBL Stormy, Zoya Caitlin and Zoya Dove.  The dots aren't even dots, just splotches of mess. I give you the freestyle funky french fail.

Hurts the eyes don't it?!? Try not to laugh too hard at my pain.  I think I will stick to stamping and funky frenches. Something I like on me and have gotten pretty good at. I will leave the nail art to the ones who know what they are doing!  I am giving 'art' a bad name with this shocker.

If you think there is hope for me yet, please leave me tips on what steps to take, what brushes to use etc.  Or take pity on me and just tell me nicely to give it up for the sake of all mankind!


  1. I find your lack of faith disturbing.

    Keep trying, you will get better at it. :)

  2. Aww Its ok I'm nail art challenged, and this is better than what I can do, I can't give any tips on how to get better but I don't think u should give up, ive been having some success with scotch tape designs, someone with mad nail skills should give us classes lol

  3. Using tape really helps. I can't even use those striper things. Tape is like the jeebus of nail art. It's good stuff. And to make dots, I shove a pin into a pencil eraser and use that as a dotting tool. Kind of like the Manicure McGyver. Ooh, I like that.

  4. @Sandra-Yes I give up easily sometimes! I appreciate the faith you have in me!

    @Beauxs mom-That's it! I'm nail art challenged! I tried scotch tape-not so good either

    @Laura-do you do a big blob of polish on the pin? and drop it on?

  5. I love the grey! I won't even take pics of most of my nail fails!

  6. @P&C-thought it'd give people a good laugh! Plus I really am hoping for help

  7. so.. Im not sure what look u had in mind, but this to me actually looks cool, it looks abstract, i dont think I could pull this look even if i was going for it, great choice of colors too. I agree with other post, probly tape would give you better lines if thats what you wanted and on the dotting tool maybe you are just pressing too hard on the nail.. mmmm thats all i have i suck at nail art myself :-P

  8. @PolishAmor- can't say I really had a look in mind- yes the colors are cool together and I am probably pressing too hard. Will call it abstract art as you say! Will try again!

  9. Maybe it wasn't what you intended however the color choices were good and the center looks like a puffy cloud. I think nail art takes practice - at least it does for me. If you want instant success try stickers.

  10. Maybe if you used different colors and made your stripes skinnier? I think it looks pretty good. The colors blend in too much though. I love greys so I am digging this polish!

  11. The dotting
    tool works really well, watch some videos on YouTube and you will learn how to use it in few minutes. That's why they are so popular: it is really easy. If you do a French tip, what helps is to twist your finer a but instead of moving with the brush. I think it gives a cleaner line. But anyway nothing is easy on dominant hand... You can try just a silver foil polish for the French tip for practice and mistakes are less noticeable. As for any other nail art designs, I think using fine brush and acrylic paint OVER polishes nail and sealing it with top coat. Hope this helps!

  12. @DesertNails8-thank you for making me feel better! You are also one of the first to comment when I started my blog! I remember!!

    @Nail-Venturous-Yeah the colors are cool together-I am my own worst critic!

    @Sasha-thanks for the tips! I appreciate them alot!


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